(Jacquie W, if you’re reading this, yes, I’m borrowing your FB post line from way back when. Hope that’s ok!)
In this recent quest of mine to stop being stupid via focusing on one thing at a time (aka STOP multitasking), I’ve discovered meditating. OK…..stop laughing…rolling your eyes….groaning…I KNOW. Meditating? Really? Dude, I’ve totally moved back to CO, right? Next thing you know, I’ll stop shaving, grow dreadlocks and start following the Dead. Oh wait…they’re dead (at least Jerry, and, come on, he’s the only one I know).
Besides, I already tried on the hippie bit back in college in Boulder….it didn’t fit….I like showering too much.
But, I digress.
Yes, folks. Meditating. Now, you have to understand, this is not the first step down this path that I’ve taken. I’ve been eating (mostly) Primal for about 6 months (more on that in another post), with much leeway to fall off the wagon, I buy almost 100% organic, I get my milk delivered to my doorstep from a local dairy, I work out regularly (including yoga) and I recently went to a Naturopath.
I’m guessing your starting to say “Huh?” and “Why?”. Or just shaking your head and thinking “Man, that altitude has really gotten to her.” And, yes, folks, even though it’s legal in this state for medicinal purposes, I am NOT smoking anything.
This is all in the pursuit of being a better ME. Being a better MBA, a better MOM, a better MRS…and mostly just a plain old better ME.
See, I didn’t realize it while it was happening, but the past few years have been nuts. With so much going on, so much to deal with, so many changes, I kind of lost touch with the present. And, apparently, that’s what meditation is all about. Being present. Frankly, that’s what all these life changes are about.
I know that sounds a little odd, but think about it. How much of your time is spent thinking/reliving the past or stressing/planning for the future? When you’re multitasking: getting the kids breakfast ready, checking email, feeding the dog, thinking about the day, remembering something you forgot to do, writing up a grocery list, thinking about your work project, forgetting to shower or brush your hair…..how much are you actually missing? I mean, do you actually taste the food you cook? Do you look at your kids? Do you listen to what they’re saying? Do you see their desire to interact with you?
Sadly, I sure don’t. I’m so focused on doing, finishing, checking things off my list, moving, moving, moving. And, at the end of the day, my to do list is still there….but my kids will be in college. And, I really don’t want to look back and think about all the times I missed out on. Honestly? I don’t want to spend too much time thinking about the past at all. Because I want to be able to enjoy NOW. I’m realizing that as much as I keep saying I want a break from my life, to take a vacation or just sleep in….what I really want to do is focus on the here and now. ’Cause you know what? It’s pretty damn good. My kids are amazing and getting more amazing each day. And my husband is wonderful. And I don’t want to ever take any of that for granted.
In the immortal words of Ferris, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”
So, I’m trying it. Just like I’m trying all these other things. So far, eating Primal is making my body feel better (my mom has celiac’s….I’m guessing I’m at least slightly gluten sensitive), eating organic and local just plain tastes better (and makes me feel better knowing I’m doing something ‘green’), working out…well, we all know the benefits of that…..and the naturopath has given me some options outside medicine to even out my crazy mood swings (and oh by the way….working a heck of a lot better!).
I’ve only really meditated a few times, but I can already feel the difference. You’re probably saying, “it’s just in your head”. Well, yeah, it is. And that’s where it’s supposed to be. I’m calmer, more relaxed, more willing to play and SEE my kids, more focused and less “multitasked”.
Who knows if it’s meditation, any of a combination of the above changes I’ve made or simply a placebo affect. But, you know what? Who cares.
What about you? What do you do to find your inner Zen?
Have you ever heard that phrase? For some reason I’ve been hearing it a lot recently. So, I decided to do a little Wikipedia research (have I mentioned I’m a big fan of Wikipedia?) about where it came from. I always thought it came from Tom Wolfe’s “The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test“. Turns out I’m wrong:
