MBA Mommy

Part MBA, Part MRS, Part MOM…..All ME

Posts Tagged ‘multi-tasking’

I am Zen Mommy

Posted by mbamommy on April 12, 2011

(Jacquie W, if you’re reading this, yes, I’m borrowing your FB post line from way back when.  Hope that’s ok!)

In this recent quest of mine to stop being stupid via focusing on one thing at a time (aka STOP multitasking), I’ve discovered meditating.  OK…..stop laughing…rolling your eyes….groaning…I KNOW. Meditating?  Really?  Dude, I’ve totally moved back to CO, right?  Next thing you know, I’ll stop shaving, grow dreadlocks and start following the Dead.  Oh wait…they’re dead (at least Jerry, and, come on, he’s the only one I know).

Besides, I already tried on the hippie bit back in college in Boulder….it didn’t fit….I like showering too much.

But, I digress.

Yes, folks.  Meditating.  Now, you have to understand, this is not the first step down this path that I’ve taken.  I’ve been eating (mostly) Primal for about 6 months (more on that in another post), with much leeway to fall off the wagon, I buy almost 100% organic, I get my milk delivered to my doorstep from a local dairy, I work out regularly (including yoga) and I recently went to a Naturopath.

I’m guessing your starting to say “Huh?” and “Why?”.  Or just shaking your head and thinking “Man, that altitude has really gotten to her.”  And, yes, folks, even though it’s legal in this state for medicinal purposes, I am NOT smoking anything.

This is all in the pursuit of being a better ME.  Being a better MBA, a better MOM, a better MRS…and mostly just a plain old better ME.

See, I didn’t realize it while it was happening, but the past few years have been nuts.  With so much going on, so much to deal with, so many changes, I kind of lost touch with the present.  And, apparently, that’s what meditation is all about.  Being present. Frankly, that’s what all these life changes are about.

I know that sounds a little odd, but think about it.  How much of your time is spent thinking/reliving the past or stressing/planning for the future?  When you’re multitasking: getting the kids breakfast ready, checking email, feeding the dog, thinking about the day, remembering something you forgot to do, writing up a grocery list, thinking about your work project, forgetting to shower or brush your hair… much are you actually missing?  I mean, do you actually taste the food you cook?  Do you look at your kids?  Do you listen to what they’re saying?  Do you see their desire to interact with you?

Sadly, I sure don’t.  I’m so focused on doing, finishing, checking things off my list, moving, moving, moving.  And, at the end of the day, my to do list is still there….but my kids will be in college.  And, I really don’t want to look back and think about all the times I missed out on.  Honestly?  I don’t want to spend too much time thinking about the past at all.  Because I want to be able to enjoy NOW.  I’m realizing that as much as I keep saying I want a break from my life, to take a vacation or just sleep in….what I really want to do is focus on the here and now.  ‘Cause you know what?  It’s pretty damn good.  My kids are amazing and getting more amazing each day.  And my husband is wonderful.  And I don’t want to ever take any of that for granted.

In the immortal words of Ferris, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

So, I’m trying it.  Just like I’m trying all these other things.  So far, eating Primal is making my body feel better (my mom has celiac’s….I’m guessing I’m at least slightly gluten sensitive), eating organic and local just plain tastes better (and makes me feel better knowing I’m doing something ‘green’), working out…well, we all know the benefits of that…..and the naturopath has given me some options outside medicine to even out my crazy mood swings (and oh by the way….working a heck of a lot better!).

I’ve only really meditated a few times, but I can already feel the difference.  You’re probably saying, “it’s just in your head”.  Well, yeah, it is.  And that’s where it’s supposed to be.  I’m calmer, more relaxed, more willing to play and SEE my kids, more focused and less “multitasked”.

Who knows if it’s meditation, any of a combination of the above changes I’ve made or simply a placebo affect.  But, you know what?  Who cares.

What about you?  What do you do to find your inner Zen?

Posted in MBA, ME, MOM, MRS | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 3 Comments »

Multi-tasking is making me stupid

Posted by mbamommy on April 8, 2011

I have always taken pride in the fact that I’m a multi-tasker.  Give me a million things to do in an hour?  Done.  Force me to take a day off and do nothing but sit on the couch?  Doesn’t even compute.  All my life, other people have marveled at how much I can accomplish in any given day.  The past few years are a huge testament to that.  In the last 6 years, I’ve bought a house, gotten married, switched jobs 4 times, sold a house, moved to NC, had a kid, had another kid, dealt with an autism diagnosis, moved to CO, sold a house….the list goes on.  And I can’t say that I’m much different than anyone else in this country.

I can get my kids up, fed, dressed, answer emails, get myself dressed, dog fed, answer emails, answer emails and get out the door in 1.5 hours and be 5 minutes early to wherever we needed to go.  It takes J at least twice that time and he always forgets something.

And, I used to take enormous pride in that. In keeping myself and my family on track.

What I didn’t realize was the toll it was taking on me.  I failed to notice the stress I was putting on myself and everyone else to go go go.  And, it was literally making me stupid.  I was so distracted with a gagillion other things I was starting to forget words.  I’d start a sentence, get distracted and stop talking.  I’d forget all sorts of words.  And not even big words like “vociferous” or “voluminous”.  No, I wasn’t that impressive.  I’d forget words like “car” or “bed”.  And, while I’d be able to get everyone out the door in record time, I’d do 50 more laps than need be in the kitchen because I was trying to do too many things at one time.  I’d have 5 different half done tasks going at all times.  And the draw of my blackberry buzzing only made it worse.

And then, 3 things happened.

First, someone gave me permission to be a few minutes late.  I mean, really.  When you have a 4 yr old and a 2.5 yr old, who the hell truly expects you to be 5 minutes early?!?  And, at the end of the day, the world is not going to come to an end if you arrive 5 minutes after the school bell.  I’m pretty sure you’re not even going to be the last person walking through the door. And, if you’re like me and you’re harried to get there 5 minutes early, that extra 10 minutes makes you feel calm, cool and collected.

Second, J and I went to the PEP conference (more on that in another post) in Colorado Springs this past weekend and he convinced me I should leave my crackberry at home.  Don’t worry folks, he still had his so if any distress calls came from the grandparents, we were on it (note: none came, score!). I started the weekend off counting how many times I had the urge to check it.  I think it was around 30 the first hour – once every 2 minutes.  I’m thinking that’s how a heroin addict feels coming off of heroin….well…minus the puking, sweats, headaches, visions, etc.  But, then, the urges became less and less and I started to feel free-er.  I was able to focus on the conference, myself and J so much more than usual.  And, we had an amazing time.  And, I felt smart again!  Whooo hoooo!!!!!

Third, I was trying to read an article online and realized my eyes were jumping all over the page and I hadn’t truly read anything!  If you had asked me what I had just spent the last 15 minutes doing I couldn’t have told you.  Not even the topic.  And it was one I CHOSE to read!

Well, that was it.  I was officially stupid.  I couldn’t retain anything.  I couldn’t learn anything.  And, I am NOT stupid.

So, I am officially rehabilitating myself.  When I catch myself wandering off, topic I re-read.  When I find myself stopping in the middle of a sentence, I stop everything else I’m doing, look at the person and try to salvage my comments.  I turn off my blackberry while I’m playing with the kids or making breakfast or getting dressed or whatever.  It’s not an easy feat but I’m pretty confident that slowing down and focusing more is going to be beneficial to my entire family.

Some call it mommy brain, some call it multi-tasking, some call it life…..I call it done.

What about you?  Are you a victim of multi-tasking stupidity?

Posted in ME, MOM | Tagged: , , , , | 9 Comments »

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